Just Keep Swimming

Lastnight was one of the weirdest nights in probably my entire life.


It all began with unbelievable drama at my house - not involving me - between the other occupants in the house. Basically, the family I live with needs some serious counseling. I'll leave it at that.

I decided late in the evening, against my better judgement, to meet up with a friend at Northside Tavern on Howell Mill...all the while knowing I was almost out of gas....amidst a gas crisis....yeah, great idea. For some reason, I tried to navigate through the city as opposed to hopping on 85. And of course, I got lost. Not only did I get lost, I got lost in the hood. I don't mean the hood like "Oh, this is a lower income part of town." No, I mean the hood where, at a traffic light, a man walked up to my car wanting money and called me a 'white bitch' when I waved him away. Now if I were in the 'burbs and a guy walked up to my car and said that, I'd have no qualms about getting out and giving him a taste of my martial arts training. That's not an option down here, though. I had my windows down at the next light and noticed the gas station next to me had cars lined up at the pumps - not sure why because they didn't actually have any gas - but I did get the attention of two gentlemen perched on the hood of their car who called out "Hey white girl! Hey white girl, come over here! Hey bitch, I'm talkin' to you!" Yeah, fun times.

It was right around that time that my gas light came on and I almost had a heart attack. Luckily my friend knows his way around the city and was able to navigate over the phone and get me to the bar safely - but on fumes. So then I couldn't even chill and have a good time because I knew I didn't have enough gas to drive home and had passed a million stations, all of which were dry. I asked the bartender if he thought it was cool for me to leave my car there overnight and return with a gas can at some point. He told me it should be fine but not to leave any valuables in it. I was picturing pulling up in a cab the next day with a few drops of gas to find my car sitting on blocks and my windows busted out. Not good. We ended up taking a cab down the road and the first station we came to had gas...thank heavens. I guess if you want gas, you hafta go in the middle of the night. Lucky for me I only have a 30 MILE DRIVE TO WORK EVERYDAY!

In the month I've lived here, I've had not one "friend" offer to come over and see my new place, go eat a meal, hang out, etc. Everyone lives in the suburbs and nobody wants to drive down here and blah blah blah. It's amazing how your so-called friends show their true colors when you're in need, whether it be needing a favor or just a shoulder to lean on.

So I'm basically feeling an overwhelming culture shock and questioning if I can really make it down here after all. I'm just used to living in a place where people are nice to you and hold doors for you and offer to help you or just say "hi" with a smile as they pass. I was called a bitch at Kroger a couple weeks ago by the guy in line behind me because I apparently wasn't putting my groceries on the belt quick enough. Then a few days later a guy cussed me out for not picking up dog shit. It's just crazy to me, the balls that people have down here and how ruthless everyone is. Nobody's nice, nobody's friendly....it's like everyone is pissed off at the world.

I dunno what to do.